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Friday, January 31, 2025

‘Dumpster’ Tesla Cybertruck Ridiculed By Stanford Marching Band Throughout Halftime Efficiency


You see, Stanford’s Band (its full Christian title is the Leland Stanford Junior College Marching Band) does little skits with talking roles throughout downtime at soccer video games, and on Saturday, one in every of their skits was “The Band Buys A Cybertruck.” Regardless of the actual fact Stanford’s campus is within the coronary heart of Silicon Valley, California, the group of scholars aimed the less-than-useful truck and its many flaws.

Principally, throughout halftime of the Virginia Tech-Stanford recreation, somebody stumbled round Stanford Stadium in just a little Cybertruck costume. Because the band carried out the tune “Life within the Quick Line,” the cardboard Cybertruck ran across the area. All of the whereas, one of many narrators stated it seemed like a “3D mannequin of a DeLorean rendered utilizing a fax machine’s graphics card.” God, these persons are such dorks, however dammit, I respect them. In addition they stated it seemed like “a kindergartner’s artwork venture” and poked enjoyable at its many recollects.

To actually deliver all of it house, the Cybertruck goes into “Autopilot” and instantly crashes into the Stanford Tree. Brutal. Lastly, an individual sporting a raccoon costume assaults the truck as a result of they “mistook it for a dumpster.”

Ya understand it’s little issues like this that make me really feel like I’m not alone or out of my gourd for considering the Cybertruck is one thing we must always all be mocking.

The official Stanford Band X account posted the entire script on the social media website, saying “If we disappear from twitter you’ll know why lol.” Right here’s the complete transcript so you possibly can actually really feel such as you have been there:

A1: AND NOW, again from educating HokieBird the guitar riff from Free Hen, it’s the one, the one, the really incomparable Leland Stanford Junior College Marching Band

(ITOTOTTILSJUMB)!!

A2: Sadly l’ve been getting plenty of messages these days asking why the band doesn’t march.

A1: Some folks simply don’t perceive. Nonetheless, l’ve been serious about a manner we are able to enhance our model, and I feel I might need simply discovered what we’ve been lacking.

A2: Wait what-

A1: Unveiling for the primary time ever, the unofficial official band car, the LSJUMB cyber truck!

An individual sporting a cybertruck costume runs onto the sphere. The whole time the band stares at it in confusion and scratches their heads.

Track: Life within the Quick Lane Formation: CAR → HUH

A2: Uhhh….what’s that?

A1: It’s the band cybertruck!

A2: This factor seems like a 3D mannequin of a DeLorean rendered utilizing a fax machine’s graphics card. The place did you even get the cash to purchase this??

A1: Don’t fear about it, it’s all the fashion proper now.

A2: By all the fashion, do you imply literal rage, or highway rage?

A1: Extra like outrage.

Track: Panic Station (Possibly prime to mes. 21)

Formation: CAR -> RAH

A2: To be sincere, I don’t like this, this factor ought to solely exist as a kindergarteners artwork venture.

A1: Possibly you’re proper.

A2: Additionally, is that this even secure? The entrance trunk seems prefer it might take somebody’s finger off.

A1: I feel you imply frunk.

A2: Okay, however there have been security hazards proper? Didn’t they’ve a bunch of recollects?

A1: 1 imply yeah, however they most likely caught every part. Right here, simply watch it go into autopilot, I feel that’s probably the most interesting function!

Track: Reptilia

Formation: A Big Rectangle with an entrance on the facet and a exit within the entrance (the place the announcers are)

Automotive: Cybertruck robotically enters the rectangle then shortly will get rotated (auto pilot isn’t working). Bumps into the tree, barely budging the tree, lastly finds the exit to the place the announcers are.

Digital camera: Slicing to each the cybertruck and the common cuts to the band

A2: That was…..embarrassing.

A1: 1 guess this actually didn’t work, hopefully I can return it and get my cash back-hey get away from there!

Digital camera pans over as an individual in a raccoon costume assaults the individual sporting the cybertuck. The band is shocked and begins laughing, stays on the sphere an additional thirty seconds.

A2: What was that?!

A1: Properly, it seems like a raccoon mistook it for a dumpster.

A2: This was a foul thought. From you, and the man who dreamt up this abomination from the longer term. Let’s simply overlook that this ever occurred. Be part of us subsequent time once we make enjoyable of extra autos that deserve it, you’ve been watching the one, the one, the really incomparable Leland Stanford Junior College Marching Band (YBWTOTOTTILSJUMB)!

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